I was in school when I saw the drama for the first time. The school used to take us to see plays. It should be around 2060. I was studying in class 8 at that time. 'Agni Katha' was the first play I watched in Gurukul. That play left a 'magical impression' on me. It felt like magic was happening around.

In a moment, the colors, costumes of characters, stage decorations, lights were changing. That too without breaking anything. That scene remained imprinted in the mind of the school student like a magical moment. And it raised a curiosity in me - what happens behind that black curtain of the theater, that makes such magic appear on the stage? 

Following this childhood curiosity, I entered the theater. However, when I entered, I did not think that I would adopt it as a profession. I just wanted to understand what happens behind the black curtain of the theater.

School had made it a habit to watch plays. Now I started going to the theater myself. When I was studying for bachelors, festivals used to be held in Gurukul. In the same festival, I got a chance to watch the first play 'Agniko Katha' for the second time. Suina Karnali, Bukhyacha and foreign plays were also shown in the festival. I used to watch it without missing a beat. So, while going to the Gurukul, I came to know that the Mandala Theater was going to be built. I also joined Mandala's Facebook page. 

It must have been around 2014, from the same Facebook page, Mandala Theater gave information that it was going to conduct a 'theatre course'. It was a course called 'Mandala Theater Lab' facilitated by Sunil Pokharel sir. Sunil sir's name encouraged me to participate in that course. I am the person who has been watching Sir's dramas. I reached the theater and filled the application form. 25 of us were selected for that course. In the pre-selection interview, he asked me why I wanted to take the course. In response, I pointed with my hand and said - 'I want to know what happens behind that black curtain.'

Sir said - 'Ah, backstage!' I was among the 25 selected people. 

was a basic course on theatre. However, I was more interested in the backstage. I wanted to keep learning. Even when I was working in batch production, I said to Sunil sir, 'Give me a chance in light operation sir'. Sir said yes. However, I had to play a female character in the play. There were very few female artists. On top of that, one or two people left in the middle. I had to leave the light because they left the project. And had to choose acting. Where I didn't want to go, time and circumstances were leading me here and there.  There was no harm in following the footsteps of

time. I was learning something. I was enjoying myself. Sunil sir also asked me to be assistant director. But, after I started acting, my friend Shankar Rizal helped Sir in directing.  The audience loved the drama we showed in the

student production. We showed more shows even after stretching it to 10 days. Khagendra Lamichhane adapted the story 'Jar: Bekai Ektu Katha' written by Indra Bahadur Rai. And we all prepared it together. However, while all this was happening, I was also working. While studying in college, I was also working as a business executive in a software company. I was studying mass communication and majoring in English. However, I felt that I should do something and I was forced to do something. There was busyness and challenge, but these two things never repelled me, instead they attracted me. 

The staging of 'Theatre Lab Three' production is over and I am back to my working life again. In the meantime, there was no talk of new dramas. However, I was going to the theater regularly. But for me, there was no difference between going to a theater and going to a regular audience theater. The point of view of watching the play was different from that of ordinary viewers. I was just going to watch the play. I never thought that I would work in any drama again. 

It was like this for a few months. I came to know that an Austrian director is preparing a team of actors for a stage presentation using the medium of performance art. However, I did not go for the audition. From the same team, due to repeated insistence of Kripa sister, she got the opportunity to join this performance. I don't plan, I don't back down when the opportunity comes. A person who was in the 'Audience Zone' until recently, I immediately made up my mind for auditions and rehearsals. 

I joined it. I worked on it without leaving my job. The name of that performance art piece was 'Me and the Others'. There was no dialogue between the characters. More language and facial language were used to express feelings and tell stories. However, some parts will be presented directly to the audience as if the characters were narrating the story. After this presentation, the works started coming one after the other. 

I was taking theater and work together. After almost two years of constant association with the theater, I came to a point and realized that I should immerse myself in the art field. For some time, I have to give my undivided time to art without dividing it into other subjects, other areas! I decided to quit my job and completely stepped into the stage.

After that, I got a chance to slowly immerse myself in other types of theater - playback theater, forum theater, light operation, stage management, sound operation, etc. within the theater. In other words, I was always looking for opportunities and took every job that came my way as an opportunity. Because, my goal at that time was to explore as many parts of theater as possible while leaving my job. 

The audience may leave the playback theater with the feeling that they have been in therapy for a while, but I discovered the source of the story from the playback. Which taught me a must-know basic knowledge for story production and storytelling. Forum theater also gave an opportunity to understand who the real characters are, what their psychology is, how they are, why they are like that when they raise the issues of society.

During this time, 'Kumari and the Beast' was a special play for me. Which took me to the international stage. Even before that, I had an opportunity to participate internationally. In this play, there was a different kind of use than other plays of the contemporary time. Kavita Srinivasan has directed it. I supported Kavitha as an assistant director. I also did the stage management myself. I think this play is important in my theater journey. 

I am also a person who likes to find out what is happening in other parts of the world, in this area, and try to adopt new things. So, we used new things in this play as well. With many years of learning experience, this play in particular gave me the energy to create a play under my own direction. A few years after I got that energy, I myself directed the play 'Klesha' written by my friend Pratishka Kattel. 

After 'Kumari and the Beast', the play prepared by him as a director went to 'Bharat Rang Mahotsav'. Suraksha Pant has acted in the lead role of this play. I reached an international stage, a festival with a good reputation, as both an actress and a director. The play also garnered good response.

However, while returning from participating there, some questions arose in me. Out of 25 batchmates, only 6-7 of us were active in theatre. Despite having a passion for theatre, it is difficult for anyone to stay involved in this field. There is a comment in Nepal that you cannot live by doing theater alone. But, I was the kind of person who was living without making films, without making back to back music videos, just doing things related to empty theaters. Life was going well. 

Both financially and socially, my theater journey was going well. But, is it enough to just become Vijaya Karki? Is the place where Vijaya Karki is standing being built or is it being destroyed?

After coming back from the last 'Bharat Rang Mahotsav', all the plays I have done in Nepal, it is necessary to look back and transform myself along with Harda Nepali Theater. Both of us have gone to walk. A question hit me - is it enough to keep going? Where should my journey end? These questions made me cringe. 

It's not like we don't have workshops. It is not that there is no proper course design to advance the theater culture. However, it did not seem like there was much sustainable development. Even the actors coming to the theater felt that they were making the theater only a 'stepping stone'. Come, touch and go to the movie. This does not mean that you should not go to the movies. However, if the theater is only used as a ladder, then how can only one or two people who sit in the theater to do something manage it?