There is no price for sweat and tears. No one does accounting. As long as there was a dynasty, Jutha pottery was used in different parts of India. Nothing much could be done with the earnings there. It's not that you don't want to do anything in life. However, when there is no steady income, I will do this, and I will not do that.

Now I am 70 years old. I spent 37 years working in India. I was able to make three sons and one daughter stand on their own feet due to the suffering in India. Now four children are with their respective families. After a long stay in India, I started sewing shoes. I have a shoe shop in Pyuthan municipality-9 Majuwa. It has been 12 years since it started working. 

Now I have run a shop by renting a small wooden box on the side of the road in Majua . You have to pay rent of 200 per month for the wooden ghumti. I don't make new ones, I sew old torn shoes . 80 rupees are earned for sewing one pair of shoes. I sew shoes two-three times a day . A day's earning is only two/five hundred rupees. 

Shoe-Sandal money is not enough to eat well. Even a bag of delicious food costs 300 rupees. Expenses are more than earnings . The rich government has given allowances and life has gone on . Otherwise, he would have starved to death. He had to go to India at the age of 12. Being the eldest son of the family, the responsibility of the family soon fell on me. My father passed away when I was 4/5 years old! After washing dishes for many years in India, I finally got a job in Kothi. Earning from India, I taught my children two to four classes . I bought a small paddy field in Budhadevi . 

In the beginning, the shoe store was doing well. Household expenses were enough. Earned up to five hundred rupees a day. Wife and children were sitting happily. 11 years ago, the wife became blind. Visited many places including Butwal and Bhairahawa for treatment. It took a lot of money but it did not heal. That's where the debt started. Later, I built a one-storey house in Budhadevi by taking a loan. That house was also swept away by the flood. My wife and I have been living separately since the house moved.

After working in the shop all day, I used to go home in the evening . Husband and wife lived together. But a year and a half ago, the flood in Bhuswang river destroyed the house. The wife lives with her eldest son in the village. I spend the night in this shop. I work all day, after evening I lie down in this corner . There is nothing in the cooking stove . I have taken care of my stomach from here and there. When I earn, I eat by paying money, otherwise I will pay when the allowance comes. Even though he has been living here for years, the moneylender believes in lending . I eat breakfast regularly, not full in the evening . I sleep after eating on the day of earning, on the day of no earning I have to sleep hungry . My house, camp, shop, whatever you say is a hoka .

When husband and wife live apart in old age, they cry a lot . The only dream in life was that one house. It is heartbreaking to see the flood there too. The house is full of debris that came with the flood. The government doesn't drain the flooded house, I don't have the ability to bear it. Even when the river is flowing near the house, if you can't do anything, you feel sorry for your own life . The pain of not being together with the family members is on the mind. He also had to live apart from his life partner who supported him in his sorrows and joys. What is more painful than this! 

I work hard all day . As you get older, you feel very tired in the evening after working all day long. After getting old, it is becoming difficult to sew these shoes. If you work all day, your wrists hurt in the evening. Sometimes the pain doesn't go away until the next day. But despite the pain, he has not stopped fighting for the sinful stomach. 

After evening, I remember my wife, children and flooded house, tears fall from my eyes . Don't show sadness to anyone . Many people know that they are homeless. But who will tell the pain in the heart ? Instead, I cry alone after closing the shop . I take care of myself . I didn't find a place to stay. I've always been suffering. 

It's been years since I got asthma. The doctor said that medicine should be used. But have not taken medicine yet. The money for sewing shoes is not enough to eat a meal. How to buy medicine! If you walk to and fro, your breath will increase, you will find it difficult to walk even two steps . It's time to spend life in sorrow. I don't want to do anything much now . Being brought up in misery from a young age, he suffered a lot and did not feel happiness. Now it's just that I could sit with my wife and eat one bale as long as I live.