When his father hid his football boots in his childhood, Ashish Rai would run barefoot and crying to the village square. His father wanted his son to run, but not only on the playground, but on the safe path of life. Ashish had only one desire in his mind - to one day step onto the field of Dashrath Stadium wearing a red jersey with the moon and sun of Nepal.

Born into a middle-class family in Sunsari, Ashish developed a passion for football while studying at Him Shikhar English School in Tharara. ‘I played in the Coca-Cola Cup when I was 14,’ Ashish recalls his football journey, ‘after that I also played in the age group for Sankata Club and Tribhuvan Army Club.’

He was part of the Tusal Youth Club team in the 2019 Martyrs’ Memorial ‘B’ Division League. His team secured third place. He then gained experience in the 'A' Division League from Chyasal Youth Club and New Road Team (NRT) in the 2021/22 and 2023 seasons respectively. In 2021, he played in the Nepal Super League (NSL) with Kathmandu Rangers. For the 2023 NSL season, he was purchased by Sporting Ilam FC De Mechi for Rs. 130,000.

On February 15 last year, in the 36th minute of a friendly match with the Chinese representative team at the Dashrath Stadium, his life suddenly changed. Ashish fell on the ground after a collision while taking control of the ball and moving forward while dodging a defender. It was not an ordinary collision, the strong bone connecting the knee and ankle of his left leg was damaged. In an instant, a golden future of a budding player was shattered.

He is currently in a hotel in Bangkok, the capital of Thailand. But ironically, his dream is no longer to play for his country or return to the field. He says with a sigh, ‘I don’t even think about returning to the field. I just want to walk like a normal person.’

Hospital stretcher and ANFA’s neglect

It is common for players to get injured on the field, but the indifference shown by the All Nepal Football Association (ANFA) in the subsequent treatment and management has increased the risk of ending not only Ashish’s playing life, but also his ability to walk.

‘I was taken to Star Hospital in Lalitpur as soon as I was injured. There, they kept me on a stretcher for 4 hours without any first aid, without even bandages on my legs,’ he said. The pain and anger can still be heard in Ashish’s voice. ‘Even when I was screaming in unbearable pain, ANFA officials (President and General Secretary) and doctors waited for a call. No one could make a decision. Later, when I was referred to B&B Hospital, the doctors there were surprised to see the pathetic condition of my leg,’ he recalled the horrific incident of that day.

Ashish is still paying the price for that initial delay and negligence. Due to that negligence, complications arose in his leg and he had to undergo a second surgery. ANFA posted a ‘Get Well Soon’ post on social media, but the tragedy Ashish faced inside the hostel was different.

Ashish, who had to stay in a room on the third floor with the support of crutches, was forced to go down to the ground floor to carry food. Sometimes, he received a rude reply that said, ‘There is not enough food.’ When he started writing about his pain on Facebook, ANFA deployed security guards outside his room and did not even let anyone visit him. An injured national player was kept prisoner by his own association.

'Unclaimed' stay in Bangkok

After receiving treatment in Yunnan, China, in coordination with the Chinese embassy, ​​Ashish was sent to Bangkok for further rehabilitation. But after ANFA completely stopped financial support for a month, his treatment and rehabilitation at the Bangkok hospital have come to a standstill.

ANFA officials are shirking their responsibilities by citing FIFA's ban and internal disputes within the National Sports Council (NSC). 'They say the office is closed, they say money cannot be sent, but no one cares how I am living here,' says Ashish.

Ashish has already spent about Rs 200,000 on his one-month stay in Thailand and his medical expenses alone. He is raising funds by bargaining with his Nepali friends. ‘When I submitted my old medical bills to ANFA, either half of them were paid or none were received. Even after going there 8-9 times with the bill, no one listened,’ he said.

He is currently doing the usual exercises he can do around his hotel in Bangkok. He still has a metal plate on his left leg, and his fingers are not moving properly. The doctor has said that he will have to keep the plate for another year. But since there is no rehabilitation, it is not clear when his leg will heal. On top of that, his visa is expiring in a few more days. Should he return to Nepal or stay there? He has neither money nor any way.

‘I will fight for justice now,’ he said.

Ashish has not yet fully informed his family in Sunsari about his condition. ‘They will know only after this news comes,’ Ashish becomes emotional, ‘They were already worried a lot, I didn’t want to cause them more pain.’

Nepal National Football Players Association President Vikram Lama is also a player who has returned to the field after going through a similar serious injury. He says, ‘I received treatment at the right time and returned.’ But Ashish did not get that support. ANFA is making excuses. We have sought help from the NAF and hope that some help will be provided after the new financial year starts.’

Vishal Shrestha, the newly appointed vice-president of the NAF, has also expressed his sadness over Ashish’s condition and assured that the council will find a long-term solution.

Time is very short for Ashish. He is no longer in the mood to keep quiet. ‘I have shed tears in silence for a long time, now I will not keep quiet,’ Ashish said firmly, ‘I have shed blood and sweat for the country, but when the crisis came, the country’s football organization made me a stranger. Now I will fight for justice. I don’t want to play football, I just want to stand on my own two feet.’