I was born in Bhairavi Rural Municipality of Dailekh, a somewhat socially and developmentally backward place. In our time, there were no cars in the villages. Even when I passed SLC and came to Kathmandu, I walked all the way to Surkhet. But now, cars go to the village.

Once, two foreigners were running in front of the school with bicycles. After knowing this, all the students of the class followed the bicycles for one and a half to two kilometers (from Dandimadi to Jagatra). Sometimes there was a competition among the friends in lifting the bicycles and carrying them a little further and touching the bicycles. 

While studying in Dullu, one day we came to know that Army Colonel Deeptaprakash Shah was coming to Dullu in a helicopter. We were very happy that we could see the helicopter. When the helicopter landed in the sky near Dullu, all the students in the class ran towards the hill where the helicopter was located. I was already ahead while running. When I got close to the helicopter, the wind from the fan almost blew me away. Still, I was not less happy to see the helicopter from close by. 

When I was young, there were not many shops for ready-made clothes. Clothes were only sewn and worn. The same clothes had to be worn until the next year. There was not much business in the village. There were only small shops and tea shops. Some businessmen did business. Many people were involved in the teaching profession. 

Some people also worked in the health sector. At that time, government jobs were a big deal. Since my father also worked in the health sector, our family was considered to be the best in the village. Therefore, I got the opportunity to wear good clothes, eat delicious food, and study well according to the environment there. 

When I was studying in school, I used to wait for the holidays. During festivals and fairs, the village would be filled with a special excitement and enthusiasm. Many people from the village would go to India to work and return home for festivals. When they came home, they would bring new clothes, some money, a radio on their shoulders, a tape recorder, and chocolates. Their arrival added a special excitement to the village.

There were no colleges or universities in the district. There were 9/10 schools for studying up to 10th grade. I studied at ‘Himalaya Mavi Dandimadi’ near my house until class 7. From class 8, I studied at ‘Vijay Mavi, Dullu’. This school was about 2 and a half hours walk from our house. At that time, most schools were short of teachers who taught math and science. 

We studied in the same class with 167 students. Teachers loved the students who did well in the class and after the results were out, it was customary to give ‘Chelpark ink bottles, one/two fountain pens and notebooks’ to the students who came first, second and third in the class. I was honest in my studies. I always did my homework. I used to come first in the class. That is why sometimes I did not have to be beaten even if I missed homework. 

Studying helped me become confident in the class. It must be because of that confidence, from the time I was studying to the time I got a job, I never felt that I could not do it. The credit for all this goes to my parents and teachers. They always kept our morale high by saying, 'You can do anything.'

Since it took two and a half to three hours to go to school, we would whistle to our friends coming from one hill to the next, wait for them, and then make a crowd of friends and head towards school. During Dashain-Tihar, when it rained or foggy while going to and from school, we would pick cucumbers, oranges, bhogates, etc. growing in the fields along the way and eat them. At that time, some friends would enter the fields and we would sit on the road waiting for someone to come. Sometimes we would also meet the owners of the fields. When we saw them, we would run. They would chase us for a long distance. It was very difficult to run like this without holding our breath. However, now, remembering those moments brings a special joy.

During the King's birthday celebrations, sports like 'Running Shield, Javelin Throw, Volleyball' were organized in schools for sports. I was not very good at sports because I was young (younger than many of my classmates). But because I was good at studies, I used to participate in competitions such as oratory, essay, debate, and quiz. Sometimes I had to go to the district headquarters to participate in district-level competitions. When I went to the district headquarters, I could eat 'cold drinks and jalebis', so even thinking about it brought me a special joy. 

During school holidays, we used to go to graze cows and goats with our friends, swim and fish in the river near our house, play dandibiyo and kabaddi, etc. At that time, I used to soak the babio that we had collected to make ping and make it for our elderly father. At that time, waiting for months and going to the fair was very fun. The joy of those moments cannot be compared to anything now.

Since Dashain-Tihar was a school holiday, there was a fair in the village, and various types of food and ping-pong could be eaten at the fair, we used to save money months in advance. We had to work hard to save money. We used to save some money from the money given to us by our families for lunch months in advance. Sometimes we would take out small amounts from our father's pocket. By the time of the fair, we would have saved 20 to 25 rupees. At that time, we would get Chamena biscuits for 2 rupees, Baba biscuits for 1 rupee, Pineapple biscuits for 5 rupees, a small bag of Peepalmate for 1 rupee, and 6/7 small chocolates for 1 rupee. When we ran around with the goods we bought in this way, we felt like we had won the whole world. There was no limit to our happiness. During Dashain, when we went to our maternal uncle's house and got tika, we would get new notes of Dakshina. The Dakshina we got at that time was 5-10 rupees. Some would even give us one or two rupees.

Sometimes, while my father and uncles were playing cards, whoever won would give them new notes of two rupees, five rupees and ten rupees. The joy of enjoying festivals with friends in the village was different. During Tihar, we used to play Deusi-Bhaili. We would reach two or three villages playing Deusi-Bhaili. And it was very fun to see who gave how much dakshina and what to eat from whose house. All the friends in the team would share the money they collected. The happiness that could be bought for 50/60 rupees at that time is difficult to buy even for five lakh rupees now. 

With time, I left the village. My studies were good. I got a good job. I had a house, a job and a family in a big city like Kathmandu, which I had never dreamed of. But this happiness of childhood, that closeness of friends, that love of the village and the murmur of those rivers and streams cannot be compared to anything. Now, even to go to the village, I have to wait years. Whenever relatives take a photo or make a TikTok with the village as a background, thousands of memories come flooding back at once. When they see it, it feels like they have immediately left everything behind and returned to that village and soil. But responsibilities and unfulfilled dreams act as chains on their feet. This is why, despite having a heart, they are forced to live in the city.